Silver Top Tortoise: Ad bash

Let's mock some adverts. Sorry if this is boring to people who don't get British TV... actually no, I'm not sorry at all.

1. 8x the size. Could be "8 weeks worth of stuff", not sure, can't remember

No idea what brand this advert was for (FAIL!) but the premise is something like "What if you had to buy 8 weeks worth of stuff in one go?". Not a particularly daunting idea, really, especially since the first product they use to illustrate this ghastly scenario is a gigantic tube of toothpaste - like 2 metres long or so.

Toothpaste.

A product you use maybe 3g of per day. I don't know about you, but a tube of toothpaste 2m long would probably last me a decade. I can proudly boast that a standard tube easily lasts me eight weeks.

How come the agency was allowed to get away with this?? Who is the client? How come I can't find any pix or videos to illustrate my frustration? Why are you all looking at me like that? IT'S AN INCREDIBLY ANNOYING ADVERT!

2. Dulux - What would you change?

I dunno, it's something about the link between colour and emotion, so therefore... buy paint!

Except that even after the crying woman has had her room repainted (probably by her henpecked husband who we never actually see - I suspect he's down the pub by now) - even after that, and even though by the end of the ad her mouth is smiling, she still has a look of such empty desperation in her eyes, plus that apologetic little mouth motion... hot damn, it makes me want to adopt an abused puppy to redress the balance of good and evil in the world.

This execution FAIL is the most horrific thing I've seen in ages. Conspackulations, Dulux!

3. Glade's "I want to do a poo at Paul's" abomination

I know this was invented by the Germans or something, cos it looks funny and is clearly dubbed, but even they should have realised that children don't give a fig what a bathroom smells like after they've relieved themselves. Concept FAIL.